Monday, August 22, 2011

Looking back

Reading the 200+ posts by me in my younger days.. I am a complicated kid..

Literally an Angry Bird all my life.. Always felt the world was unfair towards me, I was a misfit in this world (or maybe still am). The most critical period of my life were never recorded (they actually were before i threw all of it into the fire), however some recent events are still archived away just that my mind is age-ing way faster than my body thus starting to lose my memory as to where it is.

How much have i grown since 2009, I believe that would be quite a lot but not enough. 2009 and 2010 if i remember correctly were my hardest days. Living life on the edge, not of glory but of sanity. Am i chronically depressed? My world has turned so demented. My dreams merged with reality to form some of the most disturbing and demented thoughts in my mind. All like an Alice in Wonderland gone wrong.. Perhaps in my younger days, i've met the wrong people, loved the wrong people and now i'm no better.

Posted by wJ at 10:19 AM

Thursday, July 9, 2009

post #01 after 200

music my asset or my liability.. brought me no honour brought me no glory brought me shame.. discouraged by those i wished would understand.. like a scholar who has no funds to pursue higher ends.. envy i do of those who can.. pathetic yet i am..

Posted by wJ at 3:27 PM

Monday, June 29, 2009

unknown stammer of rubbish..

feeling everything.. pissed bored sad happy wadeva you name it..

anyways.. siigh.. HORRIBLY BORED and nobody to talk to.. certain aims but lets not go so far (probably the reason why no matter how long time passes nothing changes)... crap... 1 more month of holiday.. i'm going to die.. i don't even know how i survived 10months of holidays.. !!!!... SHIIIT i need a LIFE..

probably find another twisted soul and we can both go demented O_o

Posted by wJ at 1:19 AM

Monday, June 1, 2009

random

music.. the deep relations of its language..

Posted by wJ at 11:23 PM

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

I'm BACK

Hi everybody.. i'm back to blog again after soo long since before my exams..

ok this is DEDICATED to ALL MY FRIENDS..

THANKS FOR ALL YOUR WISHES AND GREETINGS AND GIFTS AND LOVE AND ETC ETC

my birthday started with the morning crew with FIR-M haaa.. Anne, Edmund and Melissa came over to my place at 12am to give me a surprise birthday.. OMG... i was really super surprised and shocked.. and it was really something i hoped for.. haa.. yes!! finally a surprise party after 18years.. THANK YOU SO MUCH... i love the coffee cake and the card.. thanks for so crazily coming down at 12am.. haha love all of you..

then after they left after we sat down and crap and gossip for an hour or so.. i lost the high feeling in about 10mins? haa.. then i started to feel disappointment and sadness and what not.. like everything was reverting back.. felt like crap and fell asleep in a way i thought i never would again..

woke up in the morning even more sad cos dad didn't gimmi money again.. the day was going by normal the usual.. then jeremy decided to pop by at my place.. haha then helped him with his restaurant city then we played Tree Tag and Mortal Kombat tgt.. haha Thanks for the accompaniment!!.. (=

then we rushed down to City Hall cos we were late.. too engrossed playing.. so we cab-ed down.. haha.. then met with Brian and Jake and Benedict.. haha.. thanks Benedict for the birthday greetings.. then we headed to NYNY and Brian and Jake stayed there while me and jeremy went off to get the cake.. Bought the cake at Bakerzin the wordings look soooo niiiice... thanks Bakerzin crew!!..

got back to NYNY and Nicholas and XQ were there already.. yaay.. then we ordered and ate and had the cake.. haha.. thanks NYNY crew for the birthday song (= .. haha we had so much fun eating dinner.. hahaha i love my carbonara but after that it was like my heart was pumping cream instead of blood.. haha..

then we head down to Esplanade for the presents ceremony haha!!.. thanks to CM and XQ for the hair steamer.. YAAY now i can steam my hair.. wooo!!... then there was suppose to be a video for me to watch but nic forgot to bring his CD harddrive.. so haha.. we seperated at City Hal MRT.. THANKS to my pipa gang for having dinner with me.. and nic for paying for my meal!..

i got home.. i bathed.. immediately on my lappy and put the CD in.. watched the video.. even before it got to the nice part i was already tearing.. haha.. when it gt to the greetings omg i'm so touched.. and the bgm was soo nice!!.. OMG thanks to everybody who participated in it.. especially those overseas!!.. i LOVE ALL OF YOU!!!... and thanks XQ for coming up with this idea.. LOVE YOU LOTS TOO!!!

i really thank God for all the friends around me now.. really from loner to friends to family.. i never regret meeting such people in my life.. thanks everyone for all the days we had together the memories.. the good and bad but thats what makes us know each other more.. (=...

rare of me to do this but I also thank God for my parents who looked after me these 18 years providing for me.. LOVE you mum & dad..

thanks to my brother for the birthday greeting also!!.. haha didn't think you would remember!!... =P come back soon with the PS3 HAHA!!!...

thanks to my dear teacher from secondary school, Sam!!.. haha.. funny but the video kind of inspires me to want to play pipa with passion again.. haha..

thanks to YQ and Avilyn for the overseas video!!... see you in SG soon (=

thanks Barker Pipa guys.. haha.. the memories we share during our secondary school days schooling and CO-ing together are priceless..

thanks to XQ for coordinating the event.. haha a lot of thanks to go to you for doing so many things.. i really appreciate them all.. thank you so much... bows*

thanks to chunmei for the gift and video greeting although you couldn't come for the video but it felt like you were there anyway.. (=..

thanks to KB, YingYi, Donna, Xiaowen for the video greetings.. haha.. really liked it a lot.. there were funny moments and nice moments.. i enjoyed it all (=

Thank you everyone who participated in my 18th birthday.. i really appreciate all your well wishes.. Bows to everyone*... thank you so much..


I DECLARE.. i had a GREAT 18th B'day!!!

tell me if i missed out anything.. hah.. too many things going through my mind can't process whats coming out haa

Posted by wJ at 11:53 PM

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Eventful

well.. i actually had a chance to watch a Hokkien Opera (Li Yuan Opera).. and I found it a very enriching experience.. the music, the songs, the story... although its something known as very old and dull but to me that show there on the Recital Studio was just dazzling.. absolutely enjoyed the show.. all these thanks to XueQi for providing me the ticket.. haa THX!!

the next day, was my turn to perform at the Esplanade Concert Hall.. finally have my Esplanade pass to keep since my competition one was taken back T.T
the concert was "great" my scores were sent flying, but in the end it was still good.. take it as, visual aids. haa.. first time i've seen HsingHai perform and all 4 storeys of the concert hall is packed.. it felt nice performing.. took lotsa pics.. generally all in facebook.. and shocked that sam came to watch.. haa!!.. then head down to his new room.. the environment seemed so nice to just sleep after a while.. the lighting just gets to you haa..

i'm very proud of me and 1 of my creative workshop member yenyen.. we both have pulled through 2 weeks of NOBODY ELSE but ourselves.. ok maybe the 1st one had an extra.. we did a contemp for pointilistic and it was great.. other than a useless guitarist.. the 2nd one was today on Water, real glad that what i wanted to do was done and i didn't have to bother whether or not the group can or cannot do..

sad reality of school is.. i see more fake grass being installed now... and lecturers are absolutely unhappy with the school.. and the next batch of foundation students seem to have a more fun curriculum than ours.. oh well..

hoping to pull through all the stuffs and crap for the next 6-7 weeks and i'm FREE!!!.. haa

Posted by wJ at 10:51 PM

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Issues in our Society.. (Typicality) & the usual

The term of typical becomes a very common word to be used on practically ANYBODY on this island.. like i could be classified as a typical bad ass by typing all the not so bright sided remarks about other people just Not directly..

its just appalling.. really APPALLING.. to go through Creative Workshop again today.. why? cos there is literally NO change from our teacher.. he Literally says the same things.. now i know why, concert halls or at least decent stages were never meant for him.. its just not critical enough..

Anyway.. yes.. this question VERY interestingly came up.. another lecturer (no names due to confidential identity) crashed by our class and gave us something more trivial than critical but ok.. "what can you imagine yourself doing in the future?".. wow with an imagination of mine.. i would be doing very well and Not being an admin of the school like a fraction of graduates do.. (i wonder why? maybe they just have a sense of fiery passion for LASALLE [i doubt it])

I have no idea why.. Why are classical musicians all given the future of gigs and not concert halls and theatre halls or concert stages or just a giant nice stage.. What is the definition of Classical Musicians?.. Musicians who plays Beethoven's Symphony in a bar? or perhaps Moonlight sonata in a night club.. or would it be better to have Contemporary pure Advant Garde music while having drinks (i'm pretty sure that will ZEST your evening)

at the end of the day.. the lecturer was smart enough to zoom outta sight.. and fast.. we had a small group congregating and plotting how we gonna throw him off the building.. since there were so many holes in the walls.. why not make full use of them and CREATE ART out of sheer CREATIVITY of the mundane human life.. once he saw us there he immediately turned and took the stairs instead.. (i wished u came forward.. we would let you feel like God for a moment..)

i found out the core and foundation of this module.. Repeating.. it is the core essence of music.. make it ring in your audience's ear so much that it feels like you're hearing Rihanna on "Umbrella" going "ella ella ella" foreva (of cos let us know that was looped and not really sung).. sometimes i do think does the teacher has memory failure.. i was almost late for class.. i walked past him with a GIANT FREAKING PIPA without its case.. and he could still call my name and wonder if i was in class and doubted it when i said HERE..

You know what i really think about Creative Workshop.. its really about being creative at 8am in the morning.. create the most outrageous and avant garde piece of thing ever and show it at 9am.. its like the remedy for his Wednesday blues.. after all he is a """Professional""" drummer (followed by lots of coughing*).. and he is far too good for the students.. so much so that someone had his LUNCHTIME CONCERT up since 2008 and has POSTPONED it till NOW.. we all wonder why?? too busy?? or too busy trying to figure how to shift from a 4/4 rhythm to a 3/8 rhythm.. sad isn't it?

Creative workshop.. a sad ritual that is practiced everywk for music students.. thank god i'm leaving soon... i can't imagine myself growing old with it.. i might not live as long as Mozart did.. and of cos i just love his DICTION.. he made such an effort to read.. for EXAMPLE.. he reads Sing Huey (chinese name) as Sing Hue-y.. when its suppose to sound more like Sing Hu-ay... the pathetic thing these people can't do..

makes me start to wonder also.. what does Aubrey do as the DEAN of performing arts? i only merely remember him giving a talk about how he grew up with the circus and then went to explore theatre and he is VERY fond of Chinese Opera (bet u he doesn't understand a word.. like the rest of em)

someone i have this weird wish that we could somehow get the queen.. Ella Fitzgerald to sing by the FRASS (FAKE GRASS pumped with $$).. i'd like to see the building shatter.. i'd name that moment.. FINE ART.. where literally you pay lotsa $$$ to see that beautiful moment..

at the end of the day... we all must face it that we are slaves caught in this network of Monarchy... your feedback and comments are not wanted unless you want punishment.. of cos everything they do is right.. if the students end up jobless its just tough luck.. its hard out there.. or the word commonly used.. its "COMPETITIVE"... well... i'm sure everyone feels so good to know it is and this school has only 1 aim.. which Arts school can earn the most $...

Technical Theatre.. gawd.. don't get me started.. its a lunatic house in there.. hours of agonizing torture sitting on that hard floor for 2 hours... comon we're humans.. even if you're gods we're still mortals.. spare a thought and maybe introduce some chairs?... its true that maybe 1 day i'll get reprimanded for bitching about every little damn thing in the school.. but well lets face it.. i pay enough money to say what i want.. if you have an issue, solve the problems 1st before talking..

L is for all the Lunatics we see
A is for the pathetic Atmosphere we reside in
S is for all the Shitty times we had in school
A is for all the Ample money the school makes
L is for the Luxury the school gives to the students (FRASS)
L is the Lament of the students
E is for the Excellent number of imbeciles they hired to teach..

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

ok i'm tired commenting about school classes.. i'll face it.. They will NEVER change..

anyway did some browsing and i passed by Gramaphone.. and i saw a collection of Computer Mouse shaped into a woman's body.. i asked my friend.. how ON EARTH are you going to click it, and just as i thought.. u either press on to the left or the right.. i don't remember seeing a roller on the cleaveage.. probably would cramp it's style.. i just find it.. a sad thing that people would actually buy this.. whats so fun about click away everyday on a distorted shaped mouse that only stimulates you SOMEHOW by allowing you to press on boobs instead.. is humanity that deprived of bust that they had to make fake ones? i really have no idea..

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

wJ
ABSOLUTELY DRAINED

Posted by wJ at 9:21 PM

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